:D
 

I would write an ESM limerick but it would have like 20 stanzas.

no one alive will flat with fob
maybe because hes a slob
one smell of his fart
and you're out like a tart
no wonder he lives alone

There once was a weather girl named Toni
For some she was a tad boney
Her voice was all rough
But that was enough
For Ab to ride her like a pony

But I'm not bitter
 

Yes it's true the Orphans were defeated
We fought hard but our defense was depleted
But in the rules it never said
You can tape a cellphone to your head
Only one way you won, YOU CHEATED

:)

NFC was a clan filled with guys
Who plotted the Monkeys' demise
But their habit of losing
And constant abusing
Meant the Friends Club won no major prize.

>H losing? How could that be?
'We've beaten HO's, you'll see'
A matter of fate
Good ole E4M8
Owned by THMC

>H Bloodrain champs maybe
But come Bloodrain2's semis man did they flee
With a change of QW to come
No advantage wasnt much fun
They were sent packing by HO badly

I know that it's awfully weird
The way that I did hurt my head
But since Simon keeps bringing it up,
Maybe he should put down that wine cup
And just come and join me in bed.



Just kidding....

Phreaker thought he was a photoshop guru
But it was neither magic nor voodoo
CCS flopped out his cock
Juju waited on the rock
The thread is now as dead as a Dodo

Dodo doesn't rhyme with guru or voodoo. Smash you.

SSSHH! I know, but gave up.

It does if you use a scottish accent. :D;)

Fixed it for you. Cunt.

R A T E D !

Well done....this now has pride of place on the noticeboard at work.

Witty limericks of creativity
Highlight people's mischievous proclivity
While university graduates
Mock some poor hapless illiterates
Festivity versus negativity

Pics or it didn't happen
Demonstrate the Crown's rapine
Show us credible evidence
For politics of difference
Sheathe your divisive weapon!

More humour we must induct
Like, 'no complain of product!'
Or, 'no rip of client money!'
That was pretty damn funny
Although the haiku thread sucked :(

Let's get back to basics
Emulate the stoics
No more fighting
Only roasting
Akane and his broomsticks

These limericks they own
For this, it has been shown
It's just a shame
I'm forced to blame
Hayley for my renown

The opinion of threads was mine,
new thread ideas, about time!
We need threads anew,
photoshopping or two,
but this 4+ page limerick leaves me cryin!

Well, that was a bit of readin'
A big catch up I was a bit needin'
With all this huffing and puffing
Ze goggles, zey do nothing!
And now both my eyes are bleedin'

There was a young chap called Lightspeed,
Of a photoshop thread he had dire need,
But for fear of getting shunned,
Uncle Gus he commissioned,
And that's how I wound up getting he'd.

bump

the chiefs have funnly won
it is a time of rejoice for fobski and simon
we fucked up the canes
the crusdaers are lame
jono Gibbes for all black CAPton

My favourite footy team is Spurs
A team of fancy footwork do'ers
When you look at their past
you wonder why they're last
Then remember that they're all fucking cunts and footballs's homo's game anyway, and who'd want to play it... fucking arseholes.


I don't think the last line rhymed.

That lil tartlet named Rebecca Loos
Has tasted the beckham man juice
He sent her a text
and begged her for sex
now bex juice drips out that caboose

On Random Thoughts we had Rabble
With a train of spam and insane babble
We typed and fought and mostly blundered,
Trying for first post on page one hundred.
I think I'll blame it on the Telecom cabal.

An ode to Dam
For he did spam
it was already lame
so he did more of the same
Shut up, for bored I am

/Me complains about out-of-context editing

Wrong forum for that complaint!!

'Tis said nothing rhymes with "lozenge,"
Except, if you push it, the word "orange,"
But try rhyming "month,"
And you'll just wind up stumped,
And even harder to rhyme is "silver."

As I sit here like something undead,
Trying to get a poem out of my head,
I look at the time,
"COME ON! ONE MORE LINE!"
But alas! It is time I'm in bed.

Uncle Gus sat upon his fundament
And scratched his head in puzzlement,
Over how to rhyme with month.
I thall thay thith only onth,
It'th eathy with thith impediment.

Now these limericks are getting lame
People, you need to study this game!
Different spelling doesn't work
Kinda shows you're a burk,
So give up and hang your heads in shame!

Some thought this I gave
cause this was the latest NZG rave
but now I'm tired
I need coffee, I'm not wired
Click the button, this post I'll save.

ZE GOGGLES, ZEY DO NUSSINK!

T'was during a session of humping,
A Pearl Necklace, cookie is wanting,
But during bukakke,
She felt suddenly lucky,
ze goggles, zey DO do something!

lol

Now, Gerbs, I don't want to be rude,
But you're far from "The Limerick Dude,"
It's not just the rhyming,
There's also the timing,
if you don't want your poem to get boo'ed.

My timing I know it sucks
This rhymes only from luck.
Eat shit and die
I won't tell a lie
I really don't give a f**k!

:D

(no offense intended!)

Practise doesn't make perfect it seems :(

Try and keep the same amount of syllables in all of the parts that rhyme together. (I count them on my fingers :))

like first line = 12 syllables
second = 12 syllables
third = 9
fourth = 9
fifth =12.

It makes it .... flow better. I think you can get away with the last one being longer than the first two.

And of course remember that the first and second lines must rhyme with the last, and the third and fourth with each other. :)


And you'll be away laughing!

:p

your limerick has:

7 syllables,
6 syllables,
4 syllables,
5 syllables,
7 syllables.

If you added some extra words here and there it would go a bit better:

my timing, I know it does suck.
this rhymes, but only by luck.
go eat shit and die,
I wont tell a lie,
I really just dont give a fuck.

See now you have

8 syllables,
7 syllables, (you can get away with one less because 'rhymes' is a loooong syllable)
5 syllables,
5 syllables,
8 syllables.

And this concludes this weeks lesson.

Good night! :p

May twenty one, at the masonic tavern
We'll met cookie, what'll be her reaction
When I say 'Hi there Cookie'
'My names Rocco Sigfredi'
Make sure I get pics, or it didn't happen